True Love

Yesterday I went to the convenience store for some ice. I came back with more than just ice, but that's why I took $10 with me instead of $5. I knew I was going to think something else was also a good idea. So I unloaded my goods at home and heard a *gasp* from the kitchen.
Kris: You bought me Laffy Taffy??
Me: Yeah
Kris: I love you.
When "they" say the way to a mans heart is through his stomach, it's true. Or it's through his craving for something chewy. But I think the way to Kris' heart may also be paved with bacon grease. I've asked him what he wants for dinner and have gotten "bacon" as a response. Who am I to think that maybe he wanted bacon sandwiches, or bacon in a pasta sauce, or on a salad. Nah, just bacon will do.
So I've learned to make bacon my friend, and what a delicious friend it has turned out to be. If I can't or don't want to, think of anything for dinner, trusty bacon is always in the fridge. I usually imply BLT's for dinner, by laying out tomatoes and cucumbers or lettuce with bread, but sometimes it turns into just bacon for dinner. I'm ok with that, it's something I've come to terms with. You'll be surprised the memories you can erase with a long walk and half a cucumber.
Salty and crispy is the only way to enjoy our smoked pork friend. If you're going to eat bacon, you might as well go full salt, full pork. Turkey bacon can't be trusted, it doesn't even change in shape or size when you cook it. Granted, there's a bit of a mental roadblock near the end of frying up a pack, as you watch the last strips swim in the inch of grease left behind by previous victims. But you know in your heart, there's no other way to cook it. Microwaving sucks its soul and baking it makes your oven messy.
So embrace bacon my friends. Embrace bacon. Just wear a shirt you don't really like, because bacon grease can stain.



check this system out! from right to left, a perfectly coordinated station.





my consistency in crispness is shocking I know,
it took me a few months to perfect my craft.